Sunday, January 17, 2010

Massacre on Elm St

During a routine surveillance trip, Cambridge police found a gruesome scene: a couple of lego bricks and a few books lying on the floor, bathing in bodily "byproduct" (i.e. not exactly a fluid).

Crime scene cleanup services have been actively working to remove the stains. Meanwhile, a suspect has been apprehended and has been questioned by police. Interestingly, the suspect's diapers were clean, indicating either 1) premeditation (to avoid any evidence) or 2) he decided to remove his diapers long before committing the crime.

Relief came later in the day as DNA testing conducted by forensic concluded the bodily byproduct found on the crime scene did NOT come from the lego bricks - nor the books. Police confirmed all the victims were physically unharmed. However, due to the psychological shock, none of them has been able to give any coherent statement.

The police declined to release pictures from the crime scene. So instead we show you pictures of the suspect with his toys in his bed.




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